Watch Two and a Half Men Online

TV-14 CBS 22m 2003 7.1

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Two and a Half Men

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.


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Genres: Comedy, Romance

Stars: Jon Cryer Angus T. Jones Conchata Ferrell Charlie Sheen

Creators: Lee Aronsohn Chuck Lorre

Two and a Half Men Full Episodes

S7 E1: 818-JKLPUZO

Aired: September 21st, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie must make a difficult decision about his future and with which woman he wants to spend his life: Chelsea or Mia.


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S7 E2: Whipped Unto the Third Generation

Aired: September 28th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

When Chelsea convinces Charlie to let Alan's new girlfriend, Melissa, move in, the girls end up taking over Charlie's house.


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S7 E3: Mmm, Fish. Yum.

Aired: October 5th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Alan ends up playing maid to Judith's new baby as well as his former mother-in-law. Meanwhile, Jake uses an incriminating photo to blackmail Charlie.


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S7 E4: Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator

Aired: October 12th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Alan starts working for Evelyn as Charlie works to fix the relationship between Chelsea and Jake.


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S7 E5: For the Sake of the Child

Aired: October 19th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Jake stops at nothing to get away from Charlie and Alan, after they embarrass him out in public.


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S7 E6: Give Me Your Thumb

Aired: November 2nd, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Alan's advice to Chelsea that she get breast-reduction surgery is not met with enthusiasm by Charlie, who kicks him out, but staying with Evelyn has its own challenges.


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S7 E7: Untainted By Filth

Aired: November 9th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Alan and Charlie are shocked when they wake up next to a strange woman, and try to find out what happened.


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S7 E8: Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.

Aired: November 16th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

While overcoming a bad break-up, Chelsea invites her beautiful college roommate to stay at the house.


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S7 E9: Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair

Aired: November 23rd, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie discovers he has not been satisfying Chelsea; Alan attempts to cure his thinning hair without spending much money.


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S7 E10: That's Why They Call It Ball Room

Aired: December 7th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie discovers that Chelsea has not been completely honest about her finances.


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S7 E11: Warning, It's Dirty

Aired: December 14th, 2009 @ 8:00 PM CST

Jake is taught the art of infidelity by Charlie, whose girlfriend is away for Christmas.


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S7 E12: Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste

Aired: January 11th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Jake hopes to win back Celeste by writing her love songs. Alan and Herb hope to keep Judith from finding out they've become friends.


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S7 E13: Yay, No Polyps!

Aired: January 18th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie opts to have a colonoscopy in order to avoid going on a trip with Chelsea to see her parents. However, when he returns home, he finds her parents at his house.


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S7 E14: Crude and Uncalled For

Aired: February 1st, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie suspects Chelsea likes the lawyer representing Alan after his arrest for a bar fight.


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S7 E15: Aye, Aye, Captain Douche

Aired: February 8th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Chelsea and Charlie's relationship is at risk when Charlie's jealousy comes between them.


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S7 E16: Tinkle Like a Princess

Aired: March 1st, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie runs off to Vegas and returns with a new wife, but she's not Chelsea.


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S7 E17: I Found Your Moustache

Aired: March 8th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie and Chelsea have a post-breakup one-night stand.


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S7 E18: Ixnay on the Oggie Day

Aired: March 22nd, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie has a return engagement with Chelsea's best friend, while Alan has an unexpected effect on a new female patient.


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S7 E19: Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave

Aired: April 12th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Alan is torn between the bad influence of Jake's new friend and the hotness of his mother.


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S7 E20: I Called Him Magoo

Aired: May 10th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Alan tries for an intimate night at a hotel with his new girlfriend, while Charlie takes a different approach to obtain the "girlfriend experience"


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S7 E21: Gumby with a Pokey

Aired: May 17th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie is visited by the ghosts of his ex-girlfriends while Alan and Jake are on a road trip.


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S7 E22: This Is Not Gonna End Well

Aired: May 24th, 2010 @ 8:00 PM CST

Charlie is miffed over Alan's planned attendance of Chelsea's birthday party and suffers the indignity of having Jake chauffer him around following a license suspension.


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